Moving On

There are so many things in this life to move on from- a relationship, a job, just a bad situation whatever it may be. It is healthy to “move on” but it can be hard, and it can take time to get there. The big thing in the last 6 years for me to move on from was my separation and divorce.

I grieved the situation a lot even though I ultimately knew that I had made the right decision to leave. Our relationship had gotten so toxic and verbally and mentally abusive, and I did not want my daughter growing up in that environment. But don’t get me wrong co-parenting with a difficult person is just as hard as living with them in some ways. While I have my freedom, when it comes to my daughter he fights me on every joint decision that we have to make together which is exhausting.

I think time and just getting into new routines helps the process. Since I left, I have moved three times and each time has given me clarity on getting rid of stuff that can trigger memories. I think another thing that helps is if you and your ex had a lot of mutual friends (meaning you met them together while you were already a couple) that really looking deep and purging/ghosting some of those toxic and triggering friendships can be therapeutic too.

I feel so much more peaceful now than I ever did in our relationship even in the good times. While the divorce was one of the most stressful things I have ever been through, I would not trade the peace and tranquility I have experienced since leaving and being on my own.

Moving on from a bad situation is hard yet necessary or you can ultimately feel stuck or suffocated and no one should have to feel like that all the time. My advice- bite the bullet and just go ahead and rip the band-aid off, give yourself grace and time to grieve and then work on yourself and get back to being the best version of yourself you can be!